Last night was a typical Thursday night. I ate dinner, watched some TV, almost died in a firey explosion. You know, the usual.
I was in my spare bedroom, searching frantically for something particular for someone particular's christmas present. I had the door shut to protect my ears from the brain-puree`-ing sounds of Troy's new Phish DVD. (PHISH IT! What a clever name. Wasn't one of those guys arrested for kiddie porn?)
All of the sudden, I hear a big BOOMing sound. I thought one of the three cats currently allowing me to live there and pay rent had knocked something over. A small table, a liquor store, what have you.
Then I hear Troy having a fit, a literal Fit. I come out of the room and he's yelling and gesticulating wildly in a way that would be comical if not for the very scary words that he manages to get out between the non-sequitur bon mots. Words like "fireball" and "four foot" strung together in one sentance tends to snap you out of it.
Apparently, the gas wall furnace shot out a four-foot fireball.
Probably because my boyfriend, whom I like to call my idoit savant, (which is still just an idoit, really) was running the attic fan and the gas furnace at the same time. Obviously not a good idea in a 1200 sq foot duplex where all the windows are painted shut. We turned off the attic fan, and the house instantly reeked of gas. So we turned the furnace off real quick-like and opened the back door to let the frigid, non-smelly air in.
Gas fumes seem to have an almost amusing effect on cats. Where as Troy and I were trying our best not to puke, the cats were scrambling from the kitchen floor outside to the porch, tails poofed all the way out like giant feather dusters. Buddy, being such a lardass, had the hardest time "scrambling", he was basically running in place on the linoleum, like Wile E. Coyote in midair, with a giant poofy tail sticking straight up beihind him.
So it was a hell of a night. We got to sleep with the back door cracked, buried under about twenty blankets, with all three cats putting their animosity for each other aside for one night in order to sleep on our heads and feet.
Guess I'll be looking into one of those portable heaters after all.
